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At the chalkface: Average

How dare she? Doesn’t she realise she’s letting the school down? Doesn’t she realise she’s doing nothing for its league position? It must be better than average.

Daisy is in the 11th year. She is an average pupil. Someone has to do it. But average is not good enough anymore. Who said? The sometimes Minister for Education, Michael Gove. He famously pronounced that all children must be better than average, all must achieve above average test scores.

Marvellous. And to bamboozle their tiny minds just a little bit more, he made it tougher to be average by making the tests more difficult and opaque, thus lowering the mean score. Or not. What a clot!

Still, however we define it, Daisy is average. She’s been measured and found to be average. She’s been predicted grades for her summer exams. They’re all pretty average. 4 or 3. C or D. No more, no less.

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