Best Practice

What am I walking into? Addressing the absence of vulnerable learners

Attendance Vulnerable children Learning environments
Do you see a problem child in your classroom – or do you see a child with a problem? Do your vulnerable learners wonder what they will be walking into each day in your school? Steven Russell considers how we must change the way we think about school absence...
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“Why are you late? What time do you call this? Ever heard of an alarm clock?”

 

Imagine your manager responding to you like this in front of your colleagues. How would you feel? Shocked? Bewildered? Distraught that your manager would put you in such a humiliating situation?

No “good morning”. No “great to see you”. Just a blunt response with no compassion or concern about why you are late.

Of course, when it comes to our students, we too often fail to extend this basic courtesy.

Imagine you are a single parent, barely holding everything together. You have complex personal issues which you keep private out of fear. Your child is equally affected by these issues and mornings are often difficult. They have good reasons for being late or absent, reasons that go beyond our superficial assumptions.

But if they are greeted this way when they do make it into school, they will soon ask themselves each morning: “What am I walking into?”

Let’s explore five reasons that I often see as part of my work with vulnerable students for why they may be late or absent to school:

  1. “If I leave my dad alone, he will be drunk by the time I get home, so I’m either late or I don’t come in.”
  2. “I prefer facing the bullies on my screen because I can turn it off, but in school it’s difficult to escape from them. Even after school, they follow me and call me nasty names.”
  3. “I’m afraid to talk about my nightmares. I stay awake at night because I’m scared to sleep. Some nights, I don’t sleep at all.”
  4. “They don’t understand how terrifying school is for me. I’m not one of those students who can pretend everything is okay when it’s not. If I’m late, it simply means less time in school.”
  5. “I feel uncomfortable sitting in the classroom, knowing that my mom is left alone with my stepdad. He’s horrible to her. It’s challenging to concentrate on work when my mom is being hurt like that.”

Imagine being one of these students, so frightened that your teachers will discover the real reason for your lateness and that this will put others in danger. 

So you decide to lie: “My alarm didn’t go off, Miss. I missed my bus, Sir.”

Safeguarding expert Elizabeth Rose wrote in SecEd recently that poor attendance and punctuality can often be a safeguarding issue: “Staff should understand that children with poor attendance may be more vulnerable – they need to know that poor attendance could be a sign of abuse or harm.” (Rose, 2023).

When we challenge students in this way about lateness it compels them to lie if they fear that the truth will lead to more problems for them or their family. So what’s the answer? Quite simply, all students should walk into a compassionate environment – whether they are late or not.

 

A compassionate response

What does a compassionate response look like for students who are late or have been absent?

Greet them with a warm smile: ...and be proud of them. Yes, they are late, but they still made it in. Allow your first words to them to be warm and project a sense of belonging.

The double G: “Good morning, Jake. It’s Great to see you.”

Curiosity: When you get the chance to see Jake one-to-one, show curiosity about his lateness: “Hey Jake, I noticed you were late yesterday and today, is everything okay? Jake may decide not to say anything, which is fine. But he now knows someone is curious and cares about him without expectation.

Humour and creativity: ...as you welcome students into school. I have seen real comedians on the gate. I once even saw a teacher playing Ed Sheeran on the guitar! But maybe something as simple as some school gate trivia (what’s the capital of Japan?) can help to create the right environment.

Positive affirmation through contact: You will be surprised just how impactful a high five or a fist pump can be from a teacher to a student. It brings down so many barriers and gives way to validation and recognition. It also shows them you are not a threat.

 

Vulnerable Learners Supplement 2024: This article first appeared in SecEd's annual vulnerable learners supplement, which published in March and offers 20 pages of expert advice, insights, and case studies aimed at helping secondary schools to support their most vulnerable young people. Themes this year include persistent absence, poverty, SEND, behaviour, and exclusion. Find a free download via www.sec-ed.co.uk/content/downloads/supplement-ideas-to-support-your-vulnerable-learners 

 

The ghost children

Recent analysis reported in SecEd (2024) shows that during the autumn term 2023, secondary schools saw one in four students persistently absent (24.6%). This rises to 33% for students living in poverty.

The children’s commissioner for England has also raised concerns about 125,000 “ghost children” who have not returned to school following the pandemic.

So, what are the main reasons behind children being absent from education? The usual suspects, which have all been exacerbated by Covid.

  • Poverty.
  • SEND.
  • Mental health issues, particularly anxiety-related.
  • Family breakdown.
  • Lack of stimulation.

In the vast majority of cases, imposing punitive measures, such as fines for parents, only exacerbates the challenges. Often these families are already grappling with putting food on the table and paying the heating bill.

So do we foster compassion and understanding? Or do we adopt a system of punishment, shaming children for lateness or threatening parents with penalties.

The latter risks creating a dangerous cycle, forcing children away from schools and putting them at increased risk of becoming involved in county lines and sexual exploitation.

While working with children in residential care, I vividly recall a 14-year-old girl telling me that school was unnecessary because she could earn £50 by engaging in certain activities.

A year 10 student I supported in 2021 shared with me a chilling statement made by a local gang leader: “School is for idiots. Why bother with exams when I can pay you £2,000 a week to transport goods (drugs).”

For a harrowing insight into the world of county lines, see virtual school headteacher Darren Martindale’s 2020 article for SecEd about this world of violence, intimidation and crime.

What has become glaringly evident is that schools are often oblivious to the daily struggles these children face outside their gates. School is frequently the last place these students want to be, purely because they fear the challenges and judgements they will encounter when they arrive each day.

So, I ask you – should students be enthusiastic about attending school? The pressure on schools and teachers is overwhelming and it is clear that the system needs more resources and some fundamental changes, but nevertheless if you believe that the answer to the question above is yes, then we must find the time to focus on making this a reality.

 

A vivid recollection of my own school days

Let me take you back to my childhood, a time when I spent my entire life in care. Throughout this journey, I attended a total of five different schools – three primaries and two secondaries. School life wasn’t easy as I became a target of bullying both in primary and secondary school. While, amid the struggles, I discovered a passion for creativity, flourishing in drama, sports, and music, I faced enormous challenges with subjects like maths, English, and science.

I remember vividly planning eagerly to skip school with my buddies, venturing into Birmingham to shoplift and smoke cannabis. The thrill of taking risks seemed far more appealing than sitting in a classroom and listening to a teacher who constantly shouted at me about subjects I loathed.

When you constantly change schools like I did, it is hard to feel that you belong. I made it a point to be rude, cause trouble, and intentionally land myself in detention just to leave school at the same time as my friends.

Many times, I found myself gazing out of the school window, feeling trapped; like I was in a prison. When the school bell rang, it brought a sense of freedom.

I still recall my maths teacher telling me: “Kids like you don’t do well in exams.” My science teacher said: “Throwing paper planes seems to be the only thing you’re good at.” 

It was clear that there were no meaningful connections, no compassionate souls waiting at the gate to greet 12-year-old Steven with warmth. Well almost none.

 

Miss Garvey

There was one exception – Miss Garvey, my RE teacher. With her radiant smile, quick wit, and genuine nature, this short Irish lady made me feel welcome in her classroom.

Despite my negative outlook, she embraced me with open arms whenever I entered her room or she saw me in the corridor. “I hope you’re keeping out of trouble, Mr Russell,” she would say in her Irish tone. Miss Garvey’s kindness wasn’t expected. She could have easily sent me out of class a thousand times, yet she didn’t.

She saw me, she heard me, and she valued me. I will forever hold her in my heart and she may never realise the profound impact she had on my life. If by chance she is reading, I want to say: “Thank you for seeing Steven as a child with a problem, rather than seeing him as the problem.”

 

Adult-child relationships

When it comes to children, we have two perspectives: seeing them with a problem or seeing them as a problem. The latter strains the relationship as the adult tends to impose sanctions, punishment, and shame. We blame the child for their behaviour.

However, there is another way – the adult who sees a child with a problem and who wants to understand what drives those behaviours. 

They aim to develop a partnership with the child, working together to find solutions. We avoid blame and punishment as they hinder the relationship and erode trust. This process only works when we co-operate and co-regulate.

Instead of doing things “to” the child, where they have no choice, or doing things “for” the child, where they have no control, let’s do things “with” the child to foster genuine connections.

I wrote recently in SecEd about how strong relationships are crucial to supporting our students, offering five approaches that will help teachers to build these connections and effective relationships (Russell, 2022).

Here I want to offer another list of five – five elements of connection. These are based on my 18 years of pain as a child in a chaotic care system and my 16 years of experience as an advocate for children. Practising these five elements daily with your students will give you the best possible chance of building and nurturing relationships that will help children to know that what they are walking into is a positive and caring environment.

 

Five elements of connection

Be patient. Be present. Be curious. Be creative. Be authentic. These are the five elements of connection.

We may not have control over their punctuality. We may not have control over what they are going through at home. Or their feelings of loneliness. Their choice of associations. Or their decisions to skip school. 

However, we do have control over the five elements of connection. All we need to do is practise and demonstrate them consistently, day-in, day-out. 

 

How to cultivate patience

Take a deep breath and acknowledge that patience is a virtue that lies within you, not others. While your mind wants a quick resolution, remember that the child may not be ready. They require time to regulate their emotions. It is your role to co-regulate alongside them. 

Control the pace of your speech, speaking slowly and deliberately. Instead of instructing them to calm down, focus on calming yourself. Let your serenity soothe them. Remember, patience begins and ends with you, not them.

 

How to cultivate presence

Perhaps the most challenging element to master, as the mind is incessantly active.

Similar to patience, we need to find a moment of serenity amid the chaos – a formidable task when confronted with a dysregulated student or an enraged parent.

Being present requires relinquishing concerns of the past and future. Instead, embrace the moment for what it is, not what it could or should be. Take a deep breath. In this moment, set aside answers, agendas, and facts and figures. It is time to shed the role of teacher and embrace your humanity. Exhibit empathy, slow the pace, and truly listen.

 

How to show curiosity

It is fine to be wrong and even take a guess. Students would rather see you take a guess and be wrong than not say anything at all. So, what does it look like to take a shot in the dark?

“Hey Lacey, I’ve noticed you biting your nails and pulling your hair. Is everything alright?”

“Hey Dylan, I’ve noticed you spending extended periods of time in the toilets. Are you okay?”

Using “I’ve noticed” has proven effective for me when trying to show curiosity with young people. They may not choose to disclose right then and there, but it creates a connection. You have planted a seed.

 

How to unleash creativity

Creativity is the thrilling adventure where boundaries are pushed, imagination runs wild, and the curious mind of a child seeks connection.

Step outside the box and embark on a journey of creation with a student. But wait, here’s the enchanting line that opens the gateway to the magic: “I need your help with a project that could be absolutely awesome.”

Imagine a vibrant noticeboard in the reception area raising awareness about mental health. Or a captivating school radio station. Perhaps a thrilling chess competition across the school. Or an enthralling street-life play or drama for the end of term.

The options are limitless! Let your creativity soar and dare to do something new – and allow the students to lead the way.

 

How to show authenticity 

So crucial when building connections, especially because children are perceptive to genuineness. Although children may not always express their emotions verbally, they possess an intrinsic understanding of whether someone is being authentic or simply telling them what they think the student wants to hear.

The reason I have been able to establish honest and open relationships with nearly all the young people I have supported is simply because I am true to myself. There are no pretences, no power dynamics of adult versus child, just the sincere act of being genuine.

I often tell young people: “I’m not sharing this with you because I want to, but because I need to. Even though this news might upset you, I believe you will respect me more for being honest with you now.”

Authenticity also entails taking ownership when we make mistakes and apologising to the child if necessary. It is disheartening to see that teachers rarely apologise to students out of fear of showing weakness. 

 

A final challenge

The five elements are practices. You won’t get them right every day, but the more you practise, the better you will become at embodying them. 

I shall leave you with a challenge. Ask yourself each day after work the following questions and grow from there:

  • At what point today was I patient with a student?
  • At what point was I present?
  • At what point was I curious?
  • At what point was I creative?
  • At what point was I authentic?

Perhaps you can do this as a team and then, after say four weeks, you might share the results. Remember, drip by drip, day by day, we find a way.

Steven Russell is the founder of Elements SEMH Support, a social and emotional mental health support service for young people. As a child, he lived with nine foster families, was placed in two children’s homes and attended five schools. Visit https://elementssupport.co.uk and find Steven's previous articles and podcast appearances for SecEd via www.sec-ed.co.uk/authors/steven-russell 

 

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